TELL YOUR STORY -- Share your learning experience

            Please find under the Articles category in this blog an article I wrote about Storytelling, The article presents a situation I experienced with the retirement of a Senior Level executives at one of my client companies and introduces the work of one of today’s leading researchers on storytelling: David Thornburg, Ph.D.  Perhaps by reading that article you might become inspired to share your story and begin to develop your own legacy.

            As an Executive Coach, I advise my clients to develop their own story to create the image they choose to project.  We all have a story to tell:  our history, our successes and our failures hold truth and knowledge that others can learn from.  When you are preparing to present yourself to the general public, you are wise to take a moment and investigate your own history.

BARRIERS AND HEROES

            Identify your own life junctures. What obstacles were in your path to achieve you goals? Were you able to overcome every obstacle?  Like many of us you may have found some perceived barriers seem to ‘misdirect’ us at the time and later we find that detour provided an important aspect to eventual success.  Learning how others overcame obstacles, faced their fears and accepted risk are life-telling stories that help motivate us to get through a difficult situation. 

            Who are your heroes and what did they do to help you succeed? How did these people come into your life and what role did they have in your personal growth?  Our relationships reveal a great deal about us. Trust is often based on how open we are and how willing we are to honestly share our experiences that lead to both success and failure.  We all have meet people we cherish and others who came into our lives creating havoc and discord; we learned valuable lessons from both types of relationships.

BE BRIEF          

            When you consider becoming a ‘storyteller’, be aware of two shortcomings to avoid.

            First, keep your stories short and do not add irrelevant side notes.  One certain way to lose respect and have people ‘tune-out’ when you tell a story is to make it too long or overly complicated.  Keep your stories brief: if someone wants to learn more, they will ask a question.  Limit your story to present the relevant points only. 

            Remember, you are not sharing this story to relive a former experience: the purpose of storytelling is to share an experience someone else might find useful and relevant.  Be prepared to end the story very quickly if the listener appears disinterested.  To avoid being counter-productive when telling your story, be aware of the individual’s body language: if you lose eye contact, the other person becomes restless or distracted in any way, stop telling the story.  Again, if they want to know more, they’ll ask.

            Second, do not repeat your stories to the same person. Once you have told your story to someone you can remind them of the story in a very brief statement.  Avoid repeating a story to the same person.  If they didn’t remember it from the first time they heard it, they simply did not find it relevant.  Retelling a story the second time will not change that fact. 

            However, if one person in a group did hear the story and there are others that might enjoy hearing the tale, request permission from the individual that knows the story.  You might ask that person if they feel it is relevant and might be of interest to the other group members.  Receiving a ‘go ahead’ to speak will confirm your perception that the subject is relevant and is an excellent way to capture the interest of others.

YOUR LEGACY 

            Your legacy is your accumulated knowledge, your experiences, and the gifts you voluntarily gave others through your support, kindness and attention.  The most important three subjects we discuss in any coaching encounter is how to develop trust, rapport and empathy –each provides pronounced value to our relationships and our lives.

            To tell your story, there must be a purpose:  a reason why the other person will want to hear what you have to say.  What knowledge do you want to convey?

Your goal is to present your history: your experience, knowledge, and wisdom. This is the legacy you share with others to help them build a foundation for their growth and success.

Learn to express your thoughts, reactions, and concerns on paper, in blogs like this one, and on websites that invite participation.  Create something ‘concrete: a printable page to retain your ideas and opinions.

            Here is a brief story that may help to emphasize the power of storytelling.  I was working with an executive who put in long hours creating a unique and highly effective new process for her division.  She explained that her goal was to leave a ‘legacy’ at the firm and that was the reason why she invested her time.  Within six months of our conversation the firm went through a buy-out and the dedicated manager was fired during a downsizing. As expected, the work processes were eventually changed and the program she worked so diligently to create was no longer practical.  Because it was obviously important for this person to have left behind a mark, would you say that her ‘legacy’ was destroyed?  This talented lady was incorrect in her understanding of what comprises a legacy. The fact is that she took her legacy with her when she left; she now has a wonderful story of a process initiative she can now share with others as a learning experience to contribute to their growth and development. 

            Your legacy is who you are and how you grew to be the person you are through your experiences, perspectives and values as well as the support of others.  When you share a story about yourself, you are opening a window that reveals a great deal more about you than the situation you describe.

EXAMPLES AND SOURCES

            The value of learning the stories of others is to gain knowledge by learning about the risks and obstacles others encountered when they tried do achieve something we may want to try.  There are hundreds of books on any topic you can imagine that will help you understand what is involved and what you may face when you attempt a similar task. 

            Stories abound that describe career choices, personal development, job experiences, and examples of the twists and turns others have experienced in their careers.

            An excellent example of a book describing an unusual business career is written by a personal friend and mentor, Kenny Moore.  Kenny is co-author of The CEO and the Monk—he is the monk.  You will want to read about Kenny’s fascinating career and life experiences as well as share his observations on personal growth and relationships.  You can subscribe to Kenny’s quarterly newsletter at http://www.kennythemonk.com.

            If you have not invested the time to record your experiences, observations and thoughts, perhaps you should consider setting aside time every day to develop your writing skills.  An excellent book to learn how to explore your creative side is by Mark Bryan:   The Artist's Way at Work: Riding the Dragon.  The author has been a personal inspiration to me.  I credit his encouragement and support to reexamine my own story and thus take this venture into writing. To read more about Mark’s work, please visit www.markbryan.com.         

            Recognizing that not everyone enjoys writing or is confident in their skills, please know that there are resources for you to locate professionals who can work for you. For example, see www.elance.com.  If you can’t write or choose not to, you can always hire a ghost writer.

            Prepare yourself to delivery your story to create an image and leave a memorable impression. Learn how to generate relationships with others that are based on trust, rapport and empathy.